wtf?
i haven't updated for a few days, not since i was told i wrote shit instead of shirt and that was just a correction. but anyway, moving on. i haven't updated not because there hasn't been news, but because i haven't ben home for the past 3 nights, or not at an appropriate time or in an appropriate mood to be getting on and updating.
so, i'll start from the beginning. tuesday night:
i realise how content i am here and with myself. pretty happy in plain old general.
wednesday:
go to t.g.i friday's, like usual, meet the new male au pair. i got a weird vibe from him but completely ignored as i'd become content with myself and not having to impress boys. he seemed nice, very quiet and i was having a good night.
thursday:
tina calls me and i was tired from the night before and from the day i say no. marwin (the new guy) calls me and is at kellie's and they want to know if i want to meet up. i said sure why not? tina is boring sometimes, she would have made me miss my bed. so when he called i thought it'd be nice to know more about him, like what he did before he came here, if he likes his family, the usual shit we ask people to get to know them. so that didn't happen. like usual kellie and rodolfo can't oganise themselves out of a paper bag so when we finally get to firkins her and rodolfo go outside to smoke. this to me is weird and i'm like, you cna smoke at the bar, or ask if we can smoke at the tables yet, and they're like, no no no, we'll go outside. so me and marwin are sitting there and he starts asking me questions, like the type of guys i go for, do i prefer white or black (i didn't say the honest answer cause how do you say to a black guy i didn't feel attracted to you from the start?) and blah blah blah. finsihing off saying he had a dream about me the night before and then kellie and rodolfo come back in and save me. so when i said, i really have to go, he goes, oh no you need to come with m to irect me back from kellie's and i'll bring you back to your car. am i too innocent and nice??? so i say, if i must, but we're leaving now. an you know what? he knew the way from kellie's place. even better, he knew the short cut which i always forget. so in this time, he starts talkng to me about his dream, wondering why he had it, all this random shit. i was flattered. who wouldn't be? but at the same time, i have non sexual dreams. he wouldn't tell me his. i got to thinking he never had the dream, but that thought came later. anyway, i got back to my car and sped away from the carpark.
friday night:
friday was stressful workwise so when he called me 'just to say hello' i was at the point where i was going to snap so i wasn't chatty. i picked him up after i finished work and got ready. went to firkins again. there was a few of us and it was all going nicely, i was having fun, lost the feeling in my teeth for a while thanks to jack daniels. then it was late and he bought me another drink (i was driving let me remind you) and i was like, it has to be a miller lite or something cause if i get pulled over i'm fucked. so from there it isn't far to his place, which i was thankful for cause the gas light had come on when i left home, i only had so much time before i needed the toilet again and by this point i didn't want to be talking about dreams. i still didn't know what he does back home, what he wants to do when he gets back, the getting to know you stuff. well. he tells me to turn off the car. i should have started honking the horn to get him out. but i did it, when the gas light comes on i get freaked out. and the next bit is being shortened as i think i couln't get him out of the car for half an hour. he told he was 'deeply in love' with me. i actually laughed looked at the clock and said, we've known each other for about 53 hours. then he's talking about kellie's on saturday night, can i make alternative arrangements blah blah blah and i'm like, no, the point of staying at kellie's is because i can drink as much as i want and it's logistically perfect for if i go to kenosha the next day, and where would i stay? him, well you could stay here, we could (get the spew bucket) make love. well. i wasn't flattered. i was repulsed. that term makes my tummy turn. this guy was a complete fruitloop. i was like you know nothing about me, you don't know if i've got a boyfriend back home, if i'm interested in anyone. and i remember him saying stuff like i've probably had 'many partners' in america and back home but he will be the best, he loves me. i'm thinking, now i'm a slut, great. so in the end i say i really need the bathroom (guess the response, oh come inside, you can use mine and stay the night), i have to get gas and go to bed, i start work in 8 hours (i like numbers obviously, counting calms me i think), just get out of the car. a few other things i said, i think it's settled, he gets that i just want friends, ask for a hug and oh god damn stupid me, he kisses me. can i be any stupider? am i too friggin nice? where did my bitch qualities go? i have to literally push this guy off me. an action i've never performed before. and he was bigger than me, he's taller and stronger so i used all energy to do so. i tell him to just please get out. he does so. i say i'll call you tomorrow about the details for tomorrow night, trying to be nice. he's like, can't i call you earlier? and i'm like, why? and he says, just to say hi and i'm like no, i'm working. so hen i drive away i'm so angry and upset i'm shaking.
saturday night:
work was pretty good, emily woke from her nap calling out 'kelly kelly kelly kelly' normally it's mummy. so i'm running up the stairs going 'emily' and when i run in she's looking at me through the bars of her crib with the biggest grin. she's adorable. anyway, so i call kellie, get the details for the night and spill the beans about marwin and the night before, begging for her not to say a word to rodolfo. which i don't think she did. so when i pick up marwin it's all normal then he says i'm a good kisser i'm like, fuck off, i didn't kiss you back and if i did i was regaining my composure. when we get to kellie's i really didn't want to be sitting next to him, which of course, i ended up next to him. but the night was pretty fun and i had a couple of drinks, am still very cautious about drinking and driving, especially because the night before i was scared that i was over the limit. so anyway, they start playing truth or dare and i hate truth or dare. it's a passionate hate. so i refuse to play. which i'm pretty sure pisses rodolfo off the most. so he asks marwin this question like 'out of the girls here, who would you like to fuck the most right now?' knowing full well what the answer was. and there was only me, kellie and angelika, and marwin, his one good deed, said 'whoever would like me to'. so i was saved for a minute. well, then marwin chose a dare at some point and rodolfo dared him to kiss me. because i wasn't playing this couldn't actually happen so i was like, no, it's not happening. so he got really pissed and said i should be playing cause i'm helping people out with dares to give people that it's unfair. i was getting angry. so he dared marwin to do a strip tease dance involving a lap dance on mine and angelika's laps. well, this got me. i'd had enough. if i wanted someone to play match mker i'd prefer they'd know my type. and on top of that on friday he'd looked me in the eye and using a lighter had given the whole look of giving head to it. completely perverted. very graphic. so, i had two notions. one: smash an empty bottle over his head o two: get up and leave. due to not wanting to be arrested i chose two. very responsible. so i did. angelika thought i'd lost it completely and so she couldn't understand why i'd reacted that way. i drove her and marwin home. who proceeded to kiss me again and again i told him to stop and again i ended up pushing him off.
so yeah, i saw him today but we weren't alone and i had all the girls for armour who i (don't care if it was obvious) hid behind the whole time.
and now, after talking to someone very helpful, comfirmed he is a psycho and to avoid being alone with him. he has the numbers for everyone else so he can call them. and unless i've someone else in the car with me, he won't be getting a ride.
oh and to top it off. i made some SERIOUS damage to my account today. ent and spent over $100 on clothes. and plus more money at victoria's secret. will returning some pants as they weren't as cheap as i'd have wanted them to be and because i felt bad about the amount of money i spent. very guilty.
anyway, hope this week is better. my parents arrive on friday and i am very excited! but we have angelika's goodbye this week as magda and i are on vacation when she actually leaves. and i'm working for 6 days!! i probably won't go out wednesday night to tgi friday's which will be good to avoid rodolfo and marwin but then i might, just so if people hear about saturday night won't think i've completely lost it.
bed time for me. i'm very tired!
so, i'll start from the beginning. tuesday night:
i realise how content i am here and with myself. pretty happy in plain old general.
wednesday:
go to t.g.i friday's, like usual, meet the new male au pair. i got a weird vibe from him but completely ignored as i'd become content with myself and not having to impress boys. he seemed nice, very quiet and i was having a good night.
thursday:
tina calls me and i was tired from the night before and from the day i say no. marwin (the new guy) calls me and is at kellie's and they want to know if i want to meet up. i said sure why not? tina is boring sometimes, she would have made me miss my bed. so when he called i thought it'd be nice to know more about him, like what he did before he came here, if he likes his family, the usual shit we ask people to get to know them. so that didn't happen. like usual kellie and rodolfo can't oganise themselves out of a paper bag so when we finally get to firkins her and rodolfo go outside to smoke. this to me is weird and i'm like, you cna smoke at the bar, or ask if we can smoke at the tables yet, and they're like, no no no, we'll go outside. so me and marwin are sitting there and he starts asking me questions, like the type of guys i go for, do i prefer white or black (i didn't say the honest answer cause how do you say to a black guy i didn't feel attracted to you from the start?) and blah blah blah. finsihing off saying he had a dream about me the night before and then kellie and rodolfo come back in and save me. so when i said, i really have to go, he goes, oh no you need to come with m to irect me back from kellie's and i'll bring you back to your car. am i too innocent and nice??? so i say, if i must, but we're leaving now. an you know what? he knew the way from kellie's place. even better, he knew the short cut which i always forget. so in this time, he starts talkng to me about his dream, wondering why he had it, all this random shit. i was flattered. who wouldn't be? but at the same time, i have non sexual dreams. he wouldn't tell me his. i got to thinking he never had the dream, but that thought came later. anyway, i got back to my car and sped away from the carpark.
friday night:
friday was stressful workwise so when he called me 'just to say hello' i was at the point where i was going to snap so i wasn't chatty. i picked him up after i finished work and got ready. went to firkins again. there was a few of us and it was all going nicely, i was having fun, lost the feeling in my teeth for a while thanks to jack daniels. then it was late and he bought me another drink (i was driving let me remind you) and i was like, it has to be a miller lite or something cause if i get pulled over i'm fucked. so from there it isn't far to his place, which i was thankful for cause the gas light had come on when i left home, i only had so much time before i needed the toilet again and by this point i didn't want to be talking about dreams. i still didn't know what he does back home, what he wants to do when he gets back, the getting to know you stuff. well. he tells me to turn off the car. i should have started honking the horn to get him out. but i did it, when the gas light comes on i get freaked out. and the next bit is being shortened as i think i couln't get him out of the car for half an hour. he told he was 'deeply in love' with me. i actually laughed looked at the clock and said, we've known each other for about 53 hours. then he's talking about kellie's on saturday night, can i make alternative arrangements blah blah blah and i'm like, no, the point of staying at kellie's is because i can drink as much as i want and it's logistically perfect for if i go to kenosha the next day, and where would i stay? him, well you could stay here, we could (get the spew bucket) make love. well. i wasn't flattered. i was repulsed. that term makes my tummy turn. this guy was a complete fruitloop. i was like you know nothing about me, you don't know if i've got a boyfriend back home, if i'm interested in anyone. and i remember him saying stuff like i've probably had 'many partners' in america and back home but he will be the best, he loves me. i'm thinking, now i'm a slut, great. so in the end i say i really need the bathroom (guess the response, oh come inside, you can use mine and stay the night), i have to get gas and go to bed, i start work in 8 hours (i like numbers obviously, counting calms me i think), just get out of the car. a few other things i said, i think it's settled, he gets that i just want friends, ask for a hug and oh god damn stupid me, he kisses me. can i be any stupider? am i too friggin nice? where did my bitch qualities go? i have to literally push this guy off me. an action i've never performed before. and he was bigger than me, he's taller and stronger so i used all energy to do so. i tell him to just please get out. he does so. i say i'll call you tomorrow about the details for tomorrow night, trying to be nice. he's like, can't i call you earlier? and i'm like, why? and he says, just to say hi and i'm like no, i'm working. so hen i drive away i'm so angry and upset i'm shaking.
saturday night:
work was pretty good, emily woke from her nap calling out 'kelly kelly kelly kelly' normally it's mummy. so i'm running up the stairs going 'emily' and when i run in she's looking at me through the bars of her crib with the biggest grin. she's adorable. anyway, so i call kellie, get the details for the night and spill the beans about marwin and the night before, begging for her not to say a word to rodolfo. which i don't think she did. so when i pick up marwin it's all normal then he says i'm a good kisser i'm like, fuck off, i didn't kiss you back and if i did i was regaining my composure. when we get to kellie's i really didn't want to be sitting next to him, which of course, i ended up next to him. but the night was pretty fun and i had a couple of drinks, am still very cautious about drinking and driving, especially because the night before i was scared that i was over the limit. so anyway, they start playing truth or dare and i hate truth or dare. it's a passionate hate. so i refuse to play. which i'm pretty sure pisses rodolfo off the most. so he asks marwin this question like 'out of the girls here, who would you like to fuck the most right now?' knowing full well what the answer was. and there was only me, kellie and angelika, and marwin, his one good deed, said 'whoever would like me to'. so i was saved for a minute. well, then marwin chose a dare at some point and rodolfo dared him to kiss me. because i wasn't playing this couldn't actually happen so i was like, no, it's not happening. so he got really pissed and said i should be playing cause i'm helping people out with dares to give people that it's unfair. i was getting angry. so he dared marwin to do a strip tease dance involving a lap dance on mine and angelika's laps. well, this got me. i'd had enough. if i wanted someone to play match mker i'd prefer they'd know my type. and on top of that on friday he'd looked me in the eye and using a lighter had given the whole look of giving head to it. completely perverted. very graphic. so, i had two notions. one: smash an empty bottle over his head o two: get up and leave. due to not wanting to be arrested i chose two. very responsible. so i did. angelika thought i'd lost it completely and so she couldn't understand why i'd reacted that way. i drove her and marwin home. who proceeded to kiss me again and again i told him to stop and again i ended up pushing him off.
so yeah, i saw him today but we weren't alone and i had all the girls for armour who i (don't care if it was obvious) hid behind the whole time.
and now, after talking to someone very helpful, comfirmed he is a psycho and to avoid being alone with him. he has the numbers for everyone else so he can call them. and unless i've someone else in the car with me, he won't be getting a ride.
oh and to top it off. i made some SERIOUS damage to my account today. ent and spent over $100 on clothes. and plus more money at victoria's secret. will returning some pants as they weren't as cheap as i'd have wanted them to be and because i felt bad about the amount of money i spent. very guilty.
anyway, hope this week is better. my parents arrive on friday and i am very excited! but we have angelika's goodbye this week as magda and i are on vacation when she actually leaves. and i'm working for 6 days!! i probably won't go out wednesday night to tgi friday's which will be good to avoid rodolfo and marwin but then i might, just so if people hear about saturday night won't think i've completely lost it.
bed time for me. i'm very tired!
posted by hookeymonster at
7:29 PM
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